“If a man can become a monster, a monster can become a man.”

‘Professional guidance’

Manipulation is generally considered unethical, even though the word encompasses much that is completely logical and beneficial. Regardless of purpose, the result of a successful manipulation is a person that does what he or she wants. The only difference from ‘normal’ situations is that the person in question just found out that he or she wants to do that what he or she is persuaded to want to do. ‘Manipulation’ does not specify whether the newly intended action is harmful or beneficial to the ‘victim’, oftentimes the victim never finds out that he or she has been coaxed into something unknowingly.

To manipulate is easy, the techniques vary from simple thumbs-ups at the right moments to knowing exactly what makes a person tick. Less important manipulations can be carried out with a cold approach, but these are the least useful. To do something of use, one ought to contemplate on how to gain the target’s trust, sometimes even respect. Different people respect different things, some appreciate power, some knowledge, some strength, some the ability to remain cool regardless of pressure. Unfortunately, there is a fine line between establishing respect and showing off – being overwhelming can cause unwanted fear and attention. It is usually best to be almost equal but a little better than the mark in the area of targeted respect. People tend to be wary of overpowering forces, causing distrust and scepticism. Anything too weak and you get stomped on, disregarded. Superficial equality is a lot easier to achieve when you go about your life assuming everyone else is at least as good as you are, unless they want to help you. After all, you are generally on the same boat with many different people who have come to be there using different paths for different reasons, but they have all made it to the same place you have.

Gaining trust is a lot more difficult than gaining respect. Respect is all about what you have done in the past and what you want to do in the future, trust is all about the present. It’s about being not too persistent, and not too cold. It’s about not lying, but also about knowing when to share personal information. It’s about being human. It is the general approach to making long-term friends squeezed into a shorter timeframe. The upshot is that one probably has enough practice by human interaction, the downshot is the bluff – by making a person trust you, you learn a lot about that person. You probably become friends with that person, hence it may be morally difficult to manipulate the target resulting in his or her harm.

However, there is one approach that works with most sentient life forms whether you know them closely or not – the direct method. Explaining to a person argumentatively why a certain course of action is for the best not only reaches the intended result, but it also teaches the ‘manipulator’ to see situations from somebody else’s perspective. This helps the success rate of any future persuasions and sometimes teaches the target analytical thinking, therefore assisting him or her make better future decisions. In this case, manipulation is actually a win-win action.

All in all, manipulation is essentially persuasion. It does not define the maliciousness of intent, it does not define the precise method involved, which is exactly why argumentation is an excellent method. However, if the intent is somewhat less than friendly, it is better to use the art of manipulation on strangers or someone you don’t mind no longer being friends with. It is a powerful weapon and as such has to be handled with care for the danger of an unpleasant backfire. Never mess around with people you care about, not even if they are new acquaintances.